Last night I managed to broach the subject of maybe having another day together like we did last week. Trying to find a way to open, I felt the same fear of rejection, of putting a foot wrong that I write about in my current gay fantasy (forthcoming).
I asked A about her plans for the week, and suggested Thursday for a day in together. She raised her eyebrows and gave a little smile, and said Wednesday would be better. I said great! She said, … perhaps Thursday actually, … she would think it over.
Something short of wild enthusiasm, but a success I felt. The rest of the evening I was very conscious of my posture, wanting to stand up straight and be graceful. Bright-eyed and bushy-tailed you might say.
I slept well overall, but woke in the middle of the night in a state: my whole body was numb and zinging at the same time, my balls were very painful. My cock wasn’t hard but it felt desperate to come. I thought it was going to ejaculate on its own. I couldn’t find a way to lie that felt safe. A snored gently beside me. My cock was crying out to me, “Wank me off! Please!!” I was tempted because it felt so strange and painful. But I thought, save myself for my appointment with A; try and get her to touch me. Eventually I managed to drift off to sleep.
This morning she said, yes, today, and went off to take B to school and go to the gym. I bustled about my work. When she returned she said she wasn’t really up for it: tired, stressed, not feeling well. How about tomorrow? OK, I said. Today, she said, I’d like us to discuss the bathroom. So we’ve spent the day looking through toilet brochures.
